We all have different experiences of God in our lives and different images of God that come to our minds and to our imaginations. When I served at St Richard parish in Jackson as a new priest, the students made handmade prayer cards with the prayer of St Richard of Chichester on the back. These prayer cards showed the different ways the children see God in their lives. One prayer card that really enchanted me was drawn by a 4th grader, showing a tiny cardinal flying in the sky above the mountains. Like many people, I often see God in the beauty of nature, so to me this was a wonderful image of God’s glory. But the image of this bird flying through nature also brought to my mind how small I can feel as a part of creation in comparison to the all-powerful God who created us. Our readings today perhaps call us to take a look at our feelings of unworthiness and insignificance that we might experience in our faith. What could these readings be telling us about such feelings?
The calling Isaiah receives to be a prophet involves a vision he had. Isaiah sees God on a throne high in the heavens, with choirs of angels praising God and the glory with which he fills the earth. In the midst of God’s glory, Isaiah reacts with unworthiness, feeling that any words coming from his mouth wouldn't be worthy of God. An angel swoops down to Isaiah’s lips with a burning coal to purify his lips and his words. Even though Isaiah feels unworthy, God still calls him to be a prophet, showing the confidence God has in him.
Then, in today’s Gospel, Jesus encounters Simon Peter and his fishing companions as they're washing their nets. He tells Peter: “Put out into the deep water – let down your nets for a catch.” Yet, Peter explains that he and the other fishermen had worked all night, having caught nothing. We wonder: Does Jesus know something that the fishermen don’t know? But they trust him. At Jesus' command, they lower their nets. They bring up an abundance of fish, enough to tear their nets to shreds and sink their boats. Having come up empty the night before at the same place, now they have a catch beyond all imagining.
Simon Peter is overwhelmed by what has happened, feeling unworthy to receive such a blessing from God. And we might ask ourselves: Do we have preconceptions and rigid expectations about God that are limiting the way God works in our lives, hindering us on our journey? Simon Peter cries out: “Depart from me Lord, for I am a sinful man.” We are indeed sinful; we can feel so limited and insignificant if dwell on our identity as created beings, on our struggles of faith and trust.
Sometimes, our view of God becomes distorted, even though we think we're backing it up with our experiences and what we read in Scripture. For example, when I was a missionary in Ecuador, so many of the youth I served had a great fear of God, seeing God as a powerful being who would punish them and seek retribution. Yet, when the Hebrew Scriptures talk about fearing God, it's in the sense of having respect and reverence, of being in awe of God. Our experience of God is to lead us to peace, joy, and wonder, rather than feelings of shame and unworthiness. The cross, Christ's suffering and passion, and our call to obey God: these are essential truths of our faith, but they must be connected to the salvation and redemption we freely receive from God in Christ's resurrection.
In order to understand the feelings Isaiah and Peter express in our readings, perhaps it's not really shame they're feeling, but instead an expression of humility in their attempt to determine where they stand in the reality of God. When we come face-to-face with God's holiness, we're confronted with our human weaknesses and limitations and faced with our “createdness” and “creatureliness,” Perhaps Isaiah and Peter truly understood how they paled compared to the bright light of God. The humility that we feel in God's presence can be a very good thing if it helps us to be more open to God’s love and His presence in our lives. Isaiah’s humility and feelings of awe from his vision of God in heaven allow him to answer God’s call, in saying: “Here I am God, send me!”
Peter and the fishermen obeyed Jesus in casting out their nets. And what about us: Is there deep water out there where we need to cast our nets beyond our expectations, beyond our comfort zone and familiar surroundings? Is God calling us to cast out our nets somewhere in order to bring up the wonders that God has waiting for us? Are we open to using our imagination and to freeing our minds to truly see the ways God is present in our lives? Perhaps in our humility, we will find the courage to take that chance.
No comments:
Post a Comment